You know how you meet some people and you never can tell what they are thinking, or how they feel about you....it's just frustrating! There's someone like that in my life right now, and I wish I could just read their mind. It would make things so much easier. That's all I have to say right now....
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Able to smile again...
I just have to say...Life is good.
Things I'm thankful for....
*not getting up at 6 am every weekday
*not being super stressed out about work
*not working for a bad company
*feeling appreciated
*having great friends!
*My family
*My adopted family
*God's mystery
*Colorado
*New opportunities
*Laughing at myself
*Time...to grow, to experience life, and to learn
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Beauty
You should see the stars tonight
How the shimmer and shine so bright
Against the black they look so white
Come on down from such a height
To reach me now.
You reach me now.
You should see the morning flight
cutting cross the misty night
softly dancing in sunshine
reflections of this light.
you reach me now
you reach me now
how could such a thing
shine it's light on me.
and make everything...beautiful again
You should feel the sun in spring
Coming out after a rain
Suddenly all is green
Sunshine on everything.
i can feel it now
I can feel you now
How could such a thing
Shine it's light on me
And make everything beautiful
And you should hear the angels sing
All gathered 'round there king
More beautiful than you could dream
I've been quietly listening
I can hear them now.
I hear them now.
How can such a King
Shine his light on me
And make everything...beautiful
And I want to shine
I want to be light.
I want to tell you it'll be alright.
I want to shine
I want to fly
Just to tell you now, it'll be alright.
it'll be alright.
it'll be alright.
Cuz i got nothin' on my own to give to you
But this light that shines on me, shines on you.
And makes everything beautiful again.
IT'LL BE ALRIGHT
IT'LL BE ALRIGHT.
***David Crowder Band "Stars"***
No matter what happens, I'll be alright, if nothing else in the world I have the beauty of God's creation. But he has blessed me with so much more than that. God is amazing even when life falls off it's axis.
How the shimmer and shine so bright
Against the black they look so white
Come on down from such a height
To reach me now.
You reach me now.
You should see the morning flight
cutting cross the misty night
softly dancing in sunshine
reflections of this light.
you reach me now
you reach me now
how could such a thing
shine it's light on me.
and make everything...beautiful again
You should feel the sun in spring
Coming out after a rain
Suddenly all is green
Sunshine on everything.
i can feel it now
I can feel you now
How could such a thing
Shine it's light on me
And make everything beautiful
And you should hear the angels sing
All gathered 'round there king
More beautiful than you could dream
I've been quietly listening
I can hear them now.
I hear them now.
How can such a King
Shine his light on me
And make everything...beautiful
And I want to shine
I want to be light.
I want to tell you it'll be alright.
I want to shine
I want to fly
Just to tell you now, it'll be alright.
it'll be alright.
it'll be alright.
Cuz i got nothin' on my own to give to you
But this light that shines on me, shines on you.
And makes everything beautiful again.
IT'LL BE ALRIGHT
IT'LL BE ALRIGHT.
***David Crowder Band "Stars"***
No matter what happens, I'll be alright, if nothing else in the world I have the beauty of God's creation. But he has blessed me with so much more than that. God is amazing even when life falls off it's axis.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Heaven's to Murgatroid
So it's been about a month since I wrote that last entry... Anways swing dancing is a blast and I want to learn how to do it really bad (because I really had no clue what I was doing!!!)....I tried to make it my new year's resolution, but that hasn't been going too well. Whatever - it's not like I ever stuck to any other one that I've made. Such is life!!!
The latest update is that I'm putting in my 2 weeks notice tomorrow at work(Lakewood Dental Associates). Today was a miserable day for me and I've had it. I'm tired of going home unhappy. Every day I wake up and try to have a positive attitude and look-out on the day. Then it get's squished, ripped, battern, torn and just absolutely mangled every day that I'm there....
The kicker for me was getting off work and feeling irritated that I had to go to small group tongiht. I ABSOLUTELY love going there and being with those kids, and to have the feeling that I was frustrated to go hang out with them makes me feel so sick to my stomach. The fact that I'd rather sit in my room and just try to sleep it all off or watch a movie is just disgusting. I just can't stand being so unhappy, and I've tried so hard to ignore my issues, but the problems conflict with some of the things that I believe are so heavily instilled in my heart that I just can't ignore them. Things should be done right and fairly, and it's just not happening.
My letter of resignation is signed and I think that I'm finally ready to cut this cord out of my life. I've been nervous because I don't have another job lined up to replace the one that I'm leaving, but there was something that I learned this summer @ Base camp that keeps ringing in my head, and that is that God is Real and he wants me to LIVE. And part of that requires me to have faith that he will provide for me. I might have to change a few things in my lifestyle, but it will all work out in the end. His will will be done. What ever happens is in his hands now, and I'm finally ready to trust him...am I saying that it doesn't terrify me...no...I'm scared, but I have both peace and hope to balance out the fear!
Anyways, Small group made me so happy tonight. These kids are so much fun. They talk far too much....but what can you really expect...hehe I can't wait to see what God has in store to teach them and our entire group this semester. It should be fun...it usually is!
Well on that note, I leave myself hoping for sunnier days ahead! I can't wait to be happy in the work place. I'm thrilled with the rest of my life....it's just this one part that I can't seem to cut out that is just bringing me down. It gives me the chills just to think about how frustrated I am. BLAH....I'm going to try to get back in the habbit of writing in this thing...it seems to come in spirtz! Happy days ahead, PRAISE GOD FOR EVERY DAY NO MATTER HOW BAD IT STINKS!!!
The latest update is that I'm putting in my 2 weeks notice tomorrow at work(Lakewood Dental Associates). Today was a miserable day for me and I've had it. I'm tired of going home unhappy. Every day I wake up and try to have a positive attitude and look-out on the day. Then it get's squished, ripped, battern, torn and just absolutely mangled every day that I'm there....
The kicker for me was getting off work and feeling irritated that I had to go to small group tongiht. I ABSOLUTELY love going there and being with those kids, and to have the feeling that I was frustrated to go hang out with them makes me feel so sick to my stomach. The fact that I'd rather sit in my room and just try to sleep it all off or watch a movie is just disgusting. I just can't stand being so unhappy, and I've tried so hard to ignore my issues, but the problems conflict with some of the things that I believe are so heavily instilled in my heart that I just can't ignore them. Things should be done right and fairly, and it's just not happening.
My letter of resignation is signed and I think that I'm finally ready to cut this cord out of my life. I've been nervous because I don't have another job lined up to replace the one that I'm leaving, but there was something that I learned this summer @ Base camp that keeps ringing in my head, and that is that God is Real and he wants me to LIVE. And part of that requires me to have faith that he will provide for me. I might have to change a few things in my lifestyle, but it will all work out in the end. His will will be done. What ever happens is in his hands now, and I'm finally ready to trust him...am I saying that it doesn't terrify me...no...I'm scared, but I have both peace and hope to balance out the fear!
Anyways, Small group made me so happy tonight. These kids are so much fun. They talk far too much....but what can you really expect...hehe I can't wait to see what God has in store to teach them and our entire group this semester. It should be fun...it usually is!
Well on that note, I leave myself hoping for sunnier days ahead! I can't wait to be happy in the work place. I'm thrilled with the rest of my life....it's just this one part that I can't seem to cut out that is just bringing me down. It gives me the chills just to think about how frustrated I am. BLAH....I'm going to try to get back in the habbit of writing in this thing...it seems to come in spirtz! Happy days ahead, PRAISE GOD FOR EVERY DAY NO MATTER HOW BAD IT STINKS!!!
