Fun with crutches

So I have once again *dazzled* the world with my amazing clutziness. Yesterday after getting home from our hectic road trip from Vegas to Denver, I was in a hurry to get to work and wouldn't you know I would trip off of a step and sprang my ankle. What a winner. Needless to say it didn't pay off to be in a hurry. Oh well...live and learn! So now I'm on crutches for at least a week, and in a air cast...that's what the doctor called it, basically it's just a cast that goes up both sides of my ankle and then is wrapped with an ace bandage for support. it's great fun! I really don't like the feeling of being helpless, but what are you going to do? I guess I need to learn to depend on other people and trust that I'll always be taken care of. My co-workers at work sent me flowers so that was awfully sweet of them! I was surprised to say the least! I hobbled around all over work today so that was great fun, the best highlight of the day was that since I couldn't drive, Lynn had to pick me up from work and I had to go to Courtney and Anna's swim practice with them, and let's just say they're coach is pretty hot!!! hehe He's also a really good swimmer, now all I have to do is get to know him...hmmmm not likely, but whatever! It makes me smile! I'll fill in about the rest of the trip later, I'm pooped! Time to listen to some Jeremy Camp and relax with a good book!

Life is....Weird

So I guess I don't know how to sum up my day. I have this weird feeling that I don't know whether to be happy or frazzled, I'm just both so in reality I'm just numb. I think that's how I'm going to survive the rest of this week, just be numb. Shoot me up with some novicane and I'm set. sigh.....It was mostly an emotional roller coaster at work (for once in a long time though there were more ups than downs - hense the confusion!), then I came home, ate dinner and just kind of vegged out because I just didn't feel like my brain could handle much more for the day. Left over Olive Garden, Kool-aid and pj's -who could ask for more??? [let's not go there] I do have to say whoever decided to put Friends on dvd is a beautiful person! Yay, for them! Now I've got to start thinking about packing for home! Hmmmm...finding the suit case....no there's a challange!

question mark

So I'm on this "let's use all of this negative energy for good" kick. Since work has been driving me insance I've decided to get back into going to the gym. I ran 4 miles today, and did a bunch of ab stuff! It actually helps me avoid thinking about the stuff that is driving me nuts, but at the same time is that simply ignoring my problems and playing just pretend??? I don't know, at this point I'm just going to keep at it b/c it make me less crazy and it has amazing adverse affects on the potential of getting back into shape!!! So we'll see.

My goal right now is simply to keep God as my focus, it's tough because I keep trying to close my eyes, but that's the goal I'm striving for. I really would love a lightening bolt about now, because I just don't think I have the spiritual gift for following God's direction. It seems like every time I'm confident that I do, life end's up happening and the plans change with the chaos of life. I can't decide whether I did the right thing (I guess there's no turning back now), whether I'm doing the right thing RIGHT NOW, and whether what I'm thinking about doing might be the right decision. It all makes sense to me, but does it make sense to God and does it fit into HIS plan? I guess I'm just baffeled at this thing called life.

This summer at base camp, I analyzed my life and basically asked God to take control of my life, I told him I needed his direction, and that if I needed to change anything in my life to better serve him, than I was ready to change it. The whole time I'm thinking, how do I *literally* give everything up to God. I've attempted to do it so many times in my life, but does it need to be taken to the next level? Does it simply mean, quit the job you know you're not happy at, and trust God to provide something better for you, or is that foolish??? Because then what happens when that *something* doesn't come around??? I just don't know how to interpret what the heck I should do with myself. Because it would be foolish to quit my job with out something else lined up, but would it also be foolish to continue to come home miserable every day during the week, get pumped up and refocused at the end of each day or the weekend whatever, and then look for jobs in my spare time??? That kind of drags out this whole process of transitioning and it doesn't require a lot of faith that God will provide for me no matter what happens.

I really just feel like a giant question mark right now. My hope would be that God could straighten me out to become an EXPLANATION POINT!!! I feel like that's how I used to feel about life, and now I still feel that excitement for life, but it takes so much effort to be happy and to think positively; if I didn't have the hope in Christ that I do, I think I would be incredibly miserable and a huge giant grouch! But THANK GOD, I have a hope instilled in my heart that allows me to refocus, and adjust my crappy attitudes.

Here I am, hoping and praying for an arrow pointing me in the right direction! I know it's not that easy, but I know that eventually God will make himself clear in the direction I should go. If I make the wrong discretion, then he'll point me a different way, I'm used to it! Until next time, I'm outta here!

Dare 2 Share

God is Good...All the time! I'm so thankful for the times that God knows that I need a refresher or something to help refocus my priorities that make him #1. This weekend (Friday Night - Now) I was a leader for Bear Valley's youth group at the Dare2Share confrence at the Denver Collasium. There were over 8,000 people there, making it the largest dare to share conference yet! It was a really exciting time, and it was awesome to be reminded about how great our father's love for us is, and how he has forgiven even our most shameful sin, and he is just so amazing. Today the kids were challanged to go door to door asking for donations for the denver rescue mission, and to initiate conversations about what they had just learned about the gospel. It serves as a tool to get them prepared to deal with what they need to know and say when it comes to sharing the love and knowledge of Christ with the world, especially their friends at school and their families. Anyways, it was just wonderful because I've really been needing a reminder of God's power and a reiteration of his true characteristics, and not the one that Satan attempts to feed me when I am weak. The cool things was that collectively over 45,000 lbs. of food (that filled 14 trucks!) was collected for the rescue mission! So that alone was awesome, not to mention the people that were touched my the kid's conversations and enthusiasm! Then to top off the already awesome weekend was a concert with the David Crowder Band, which is ALWAYS A BLAST!!! They are so much fun. At one point they had everyone linking arms and jumping, so the audience looked like ocean waves made out of people. How sweet is that! Anyways, God is truly amazing and he's the reason I'm living. Jesus Christ's love for the world will never fully be understood on this earth, but only when we get to the point were we are being placed in our home for eternity! My prayer is that place would be heaven for everyone I know and love, if you don't have this amazing gift I'd love to chat!

Some days

SOME DAYS i JUST WANT TO DO THIS....

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAA
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

And there you have it...my day